He Beats me.....what do I do?

Question

Ok so I have a husband who beats me. Yes i know, I'm ridiculous for staying with him but we have a little girl and I'm so scared about what could happen. I don't want to take her away from the only father she's ever known. And sometimes things are good and everyone is happy but then when my husband gets drunk he gets really angry and we fight and he usually hits me. It's really embarrasing but what do I do?? I need help....how can I leave ?

Answer 1

I have your answer in this video, watch it, it might make you stronger!!! How can you stay away from him if you live with him, that doesn't make any sense. Most of the time these things never stop, never!! If you don't do something now, you and your daughter will live a life of hell. And you don't have to!!!. Take your stand but you'll have to come to your breaking point first. Just threatening and then giving in only shows him, he has alll the power over you.. So mean it when you finally say it! Have a plan on where you will move, somewhere where you have people who will stand by you... You and all of your future babies should have a calmer, more stable, less scared life. You children will grow up thinking that is the correct way to live if thats the way you raise them....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O_VkewPDAMU

Answer 2

You need to leave this is not good for YOU or your CHILD so pack a bag and split go to a friends home go to a shelter wher he CANT find you then make plans to either move closer to your family till you can support your self or to another state away from this monster.Sure things are fine when hes not drinking But when he hits the booze he changes for the monster he really is when this happens they mean what they say when sober they watch their mouth but when drunk they can't so all the ugly stuff flows out and if hes mean now and you allow this to go on IT WILL get worse.And DONT ever leave the baby with when hes drunk he can and might hurt or even kill not knowing what hes doing while DRUNK.If you have money in the bank go get it all and you and your child leave Go where ever you have to so you can be away from this so called man hes no good when drinking.Your daughter doesn't need to grow up beliveing this is the way women should be treated when see sees this she will and end up with a man who will beat her as well if don't do for you do for her.If have a car pack what you need and go dont tell him this will trigger him to slapping you around and nasty threats as well split while hes at work and God DON"T go back No matter What he says or promises its only for a few days or weeks then its the same crap again trust me been there.

Answer 3

You need to get away. NOW. I am serious. Do you want your little girl to grow up and see you get beat or it could be her next. Dont put you or her in that sort of danger. You want her to know her abusive father. Why? What good is he gonna do her in years to come? Beat her? Rape and beat her? Are you kidding you are putting her in more danger by being around him than not. Trust me when she grows up and asks you where her dad is tell her and she will have more respect for doing what you did! And when alcohal is involved one of these times it will get worse. Just leave while he is at work. Do it. You can not stay there. Tell social services. Or the police. Do something. Dont let that little girl become a victom. Or see or hear what goes on. Trust me that will have a long term effect on her. My parents were the same way theyd fight and hit each other while drinking. I am now 21 and am soo glad that that ended! Use your head and think of your daughter and your safety. Alcohal is a bad thing!

Answer 4

There is no easy way to handle that situation. You usually cannot tell an angry drunk (even when they are sober) that they are hurting you... because they know they are.



-You need to notify your family members and friends what you are doing so they are aware of your safety and whereabouts just in case anything happens.



-You do NEED to call the police if the hitting happens again. One day, it will be too bad and it could put your daughter. This is serious!



-You know your situation better than anyone here. Remember, safety first! You can't ignore it. Reality of it is it WILL GET WORSE! People dont learn that lesson until it is too late.



-There are a lot great ideas on here from other people. None of them are "stay with him".



There is a lot of information below in that link. It is a domestic violence survival kit. Call a hotline and get info.



Whatever you do, dont let him know before hand you are doing this. Erase your internet history and make phone calls from phones other than ones he can see your calls. Abuse is a form of control and power. He will find out if you arent careful.



Good luck, God bless you and I will keep you in my prayers! For you and your child's sake!

Answer 5

By staying with him, you will be teaching your little girl that his behavior is acceptable. That will set her up for being an abused wife herself some day.



Be careful you are not using 'the only father she has ever known' rationale to conceal the fact that you are afraid to be on your own with your child.



He is a bully, which means if you leave him he will harass you, using seeing the child as an excuse.



But he will avoid paying child support, also, as a way to control you. So don't believe he loves the child deeply. Men who love their children want them to be secure and well cared for. They would never see their child go without the necessities just to harass the mother.



So you will be continually going to court to get his support payments, and he will delight in making you jump through hoops to get a few dollars a month.



But there is a way. It takes guts. See a lawyer and get him to draw up a separation agreement. You get full custody of the child, and can take her anywhere in the world. In return, you will not go after him for child support. Then be a mom, and you and your child start a new life.



Let's face it. If you stay with him, the abuse will continue, and only get worse.



It may well include the child later on, when she begins to show any spirit of independence. Then he will need to control her too, so the verbal abuse, and even beating, will start. Bullies delight in having someone small and weak to demonstrate their dominance on. They never stop voluntarily. And if he finds another woman, he will find someone weak and submissive who will put up with it. Possibly a child will be involved, to enslave her even more.



Such men cannot love. Don't kid yourself.



And when you meet a good-natured man who doesn't have a substance abuse problem, but does have a loving heart, don't worry about what he looks like or how much money he makes, as long as he works enough to get by. He's the guy for you.



How can you leave? Pack a bag of clothes for you and your child and walk out the door. Live in a shelter if you have to, until you get a job and arrange daycare. If you have friends or family that can put you both up until you are on your feet, so much the better. Though he will make trouble for them, count on it.



Become independent. I did. And my three children thank me for it to this day. We were poor. But there are worse things than poverty.

Answer 6

Get the hell out you cannot change him, what about when your daughter gets old enough for him to knock her around, believe me he will. I know you love him and don't want to hurt him for fear of what it will do to him or what he could do to you but believe me no father is better than a father that beats yopur mother, she will grow up and land herself in the same situation with an abusive man which is all she will ever know from growing up with an abusive father. Think about the emotional damage she suffers when she sees him hit you and how confused she must be. You need to make your husband choose you and your daughter over the alcohol and untill he is ready to that decision WITH THE HELP OF REHAB OR AA because NOBODY can truly do it alone you and your daughter are not safe there. This is not what you want to hear but it is what you NEED to hear. Put your daughters emotional and physical well being before all else and you will not have anything to regret.

Answer 7

Dont ever be embarrased. You poor woman you do not deserve this. I really think you should leave him otherwise when your daughter grows up,she will witness this and she will become confused about what is morally right and wrong. So please get help from family or even people on helplines. Have the courage to leave him and you'll make the best decision you've ever made. Believe me,if she asks why you lef him when she's older and you tell her what he was like she will be happy that you made the right choice for you and for her. Good luck. I suggest when he goes out you make sure you have a place to go to and just leave. Make sure he can't contact you again. xx

Answer 8

I commend you for realizing that you are in a bad situation and need to get out of it.



You need to plan it out so that you have somewhere to go and money to use. A few days before you plan to leave, pull out some money from the bank. Preferably cash because credit cards can be traced. While your husband is at work or out with friends, take your daughter and go. Make sure to pack plenty of clothes and other things that you will need (toys, etc). Also it is a good idea to go somewhere where you will have support because he will come groveling. He will promise you the world to bring you back home where he will be fine for a few days and then revert back to hitting you.



Just remember when the times are rough that you left for your safety and the safety of your daughter.



Good luck

Answer 9

I understand that this is a very difficult situation and no matter how many people tell you to leave him you will stil focus on the "good moments" as reasons to stay....in (false) hopes that it will get better.

The key here is to have faith in yourself. You need to know that you are a strong mother capable of leaving this man and creating a much deserved better life for yourself!

You're number one priority your child....clearly this is not a good environment. I cant stress enough how much better off your child will be when you leave him,

My mother was in the same position as you...and i can tell you first hand, as the child in this kind of situation - staying with this man is not for your daughter's sake. In the long run, it will be way better for her to have you two divorced...and i think you know that deep down.

Im dead serious when i say you need to get out. ive seen where this can go...you dont want these fights to escalate one day into something you can't control...and you certainly dont want you daughter to be involved. this guy is not the boss of you and has no right to ever treat you less then perfect.

you can do this. and you need to. use all your strength as a woman, and all your intuition as a mother, and you can do anything in the world.

Answer 10

What will your daughter grow up thinking about men, who are supposed to love and protect them, if the witness you being beaten like a punching bag. I know this for sure (from experience): Children need 1 whole parent, not 2 broken ones. The "taking her from the only father she's ever known" stuff is about you and your fear of leaving. I had a dear friend who decided not to leave an abusive husband, and he ended up putting a knife in her chest. Her son found her....would you want your daughter to find you this way?



Children are never to be punished by the poor choices we make when we choose their fathers. If you really want help you will get off YA and look up domestic shelters in your area. They will help you and get you the counseling you really need to reboot your life.



AFTER READING YOUR QUESTION ABOUT WANTING TO DATE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND.....(yeah, I looked at the kinds of questions you ask)

I think you are a drama queen, and that you are yanking everybody's chain. There are way too many people who really need help for you to be having a pity party for yourself. If your situation is a bad as you say, change it.

Answer 11

The only thing that got me to leave was the idea that if he hit me, he would eventually hit my daughter who was 2 years old at the time. Wouldn't you rather your daughter have NO father than a drunk abusive one? Even if he isn't abusive toward her, she is witnessing the violence, directly or indirectly.



If you aren't ready to leave for yourself, leave for your child. You must decide that you are 100 percent ready to make this abuse end and know that you deserve better. I think it is hard for peopel to understand how a woman could stay with a man who hits her, but unless you've been in it, you could never really know.



There is a lot of guilt there and it vaires case by case. It sounds like part of your guilt, will be that your daughter won't have a father. This doesn't mean that she never will, it just means you need to sort out the side of it regarding YOU. It will be sorted out (visitation, child support, etc.) for her later. I know this is probably crazy for you to think about, but if you are serious about leaving this once and for all, you must take the future into account, which includes going through the legal process for your daughter. For me, it was because my boyfriend was severely abused all his life and everyone he'd ever known as family, left him in the end. I could not bear to be another person in his life to leave him when things got hard. He used that to make me feel guilty, among other things. Plus I had my own issues with the particular issue of child abuse which led to me to stay.

The irony in it, was that I left because I did not want my daughter to ever be abused. Not physically, sexually, or even verbally.



The fact that you are writing this is huge. When you have decided that you aren't going to tolerate being abused any longer, you need to formulate a plan. Do you have any friends, co-workers, family members, or authorities that can secretly help you with this escape? This plan should include when to leave, where to go, how to avoid him and any further abuse, stalking, threats, etc. he may deliver afterward, restraining order, etc. Once you have established a plan, I would begin all the legal procedures immediately regarding your daughter. You don't want to leave any openings when you "need to think about things" because this is when you might convince yourself to go back. Avoid all contact with him so you cannot be convinced to go back or be made to feel guilty.



My heart goes out to you so much. I know that God has a plan for you and a better life in mind for you and your daughter. Just do it.



EDIT: WAIT A MINUTE. YOU JUST POSTED ANOTHER QUESTION REGARDING YOUR "BOYFRIEND". SO ARE YOU MARRIED OR NOT? THE REST OF YOUR QUESTIONS ARE ABOUT YOUR "BOYFRIEND" AND YOU ALSO SAID YOU CHEATED ON HIM. ALL YOUR QUESTIONS ARE ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT TO GET BACK WITH YOUR EX. IF YOU ARE MAKING THIS UP, IT IS NOT FUNNY. ALSO, IF YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER AND YOU ARE BEING ABUSED, GETTING BREAST IMPLANTS SHOULD BE THE LAST THING ON YOUR MIND! WOW.

Answer 12

As easy as it is to say leave the man like you say it isn't that easy due to the child. If he is beating you and it is unbearable you need to make goals or steps to get out of the stition that you are in. Drinking is a real problem and seeing that he should be taking the lead in house and isn't seek help that will get you out. Stay with family or close trusted friends that do things he does and try and keep your kid informed to a certaian extent. Don't do whats best for you but for your child's well being. Don't try and date other men!! That would be wrong seeing as you are married and it gives you respect and keeps you from fault in his eyes.

Answer 13

Get your things and your daughter and leave.



IF you can't, call for help. Even if he says he'll never beat you again, leave. A man who can hit you once can hit again.



Even if a father is important in your kid's life, she'll be scarred for life. Try hearing or watching your father beat your mother. And he might turn on her one day, and the abuse will only grow worse.



Be careful. Don't confront him, it's obvious you've tried and failed. If reasoning with him won't work, leave.

Answer 14

I know you already know this and may not want to hear it, but you mist leave at once. Did you know you think you are doing good to your daughter by remaining there, but you are actually harming her. She is going to have a jacked perspective of what a relationship is. It is a proven fact that girls will seek out men like the ones they had and in some cases even see their abusers as fatherly figures. You need to leave him. I dont believe people change but if he loves you he will find you if not let him be he has issues. Worry about your daughter, forget him.

Answer 15

You could get custody of your daughter and only allow him to see your daughter on your terms and start a new life, you and your daughter! But it won't be easy, raising a child on your own. Financially, mentally, physically, just one big struggle.



OR



You could try talking to him, when he's in a good mood. Explain how you feel about when he drinks, be gentle but get the message across. Ask him if he would consider going to a group for alcholics, for yours and your daugters sake. If he doesn't see how serious you are, use your daughter and play on his emotional strings! That may sound terrible, using your daughter, but he's using you as a punch bag! Your daughter is going to grow up thinking it's right?!



What ever you decide to do, I wish you all the best! Good luck =D

Answer 16

get away NOW! by staying with him you remain keeping yourself AND your daughter in danger! soon he'll start hitting your little girl too. just because he's the father does NOT mean he's a good one! your daughter will grow up better with a caring mom and no dad than with an abusive alchoholic one. when you DO leave, go while he's out, and you may want to get the police involved so that they can help you get your stuff...



http://www.womenagainstabuse.org/



1-800-799-7233 [that's the # for the domestic abuse hotline]



888-743-5754 [another domestic abuse hotline]

Answer 17

There are many thing you can do , there are places to answer all you question best place to get answers call the haven support line these are pro's in this issue and will help remember this is not right for him to do , no woman on this earth should go threw this , take yourself in hard and get help a.s.a.p. don't let this go on it will only get worst ,, and remember don't be ashamed you didnt do nothing wrong stay strong you need to for you little girl ..



Best of luck

Some Guy...

Answer 18

You are using your daughter as an excuse to stay but she should be the biggest reason you leave! You are teaching her that men are supposed to beat women. She will grow up and choose a man just like her dad, one that is going to hit her, abuse her, and hurt her. Even worse, in giving her a "dad" you are taking away the most important person in her life, her mom. What if he kills you? Where would that leave your daughter? I've been in your shoes. It's not easy and there is no easy answer, but PLEASE LEAVE BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE!!

Answer 19

This behaviour of his will NEVER change. Trust me on this.



It is highly commendable that for the sake of your daughter you are going through this nonsense. But it has to stop, here and now.



If not you are going to the police. File for divorce. You are moving out. This is a bad dream - I am sure you will find someone more caring and gentle. You do not have to be in this abusive relationship.



Where is your self esteem? Your self respect? That, if you have it, tells you that you won't put up with it. Tell him that and move out.



He is controlling you. Don't let that happen. NEVER ever.

Answer 20

If it were me I would have already left him. However, there are family counselling services available for just this thing. City and County social services in your state are the place to start. The next time your husband gets drunk call the police, don't wait for him to hit you the cops will sort it out quickly.

Answer 21

Your so brave to speak up rather than suffering in silence :)



You need to get out of the relationship - its fair enough to want your child to grow up with both parents, but do you really want your child watching u getting beaten up when its older?? The child can still also see its dad with visitation rights etc.



Try the websites below for more information and how to get help. The second website also shows you how to remove your history so the websites cant be traced. Also, your doctor would be able to give you advice.



I really hope you get out of the relationship soon. Good Luck

Answer 22

Get out of the house as soon as possible. The same thing happened with my mum and dad, I'm glad my mum left him because he was really horrible to us. Your daughter will thank you when she grows up and understands what was going on if anything she will be proud of you for plucking up the courage and walking out on him. You should all be happy all the time there is no need for anyone to get hurt. When he goes to work just run away, get as far away as possible.

Answer 23

Get out now go to a womens shelter if you have 2.



Call the police he wont get custy of her

TRUE STORY



A lil girl 5 year old got shot in the back by her MOMS boyfriend, the lil girl jumped infront of her mom as the Boyfriend was about to shot the mom. She just want to protect her mom.



Stats say that if a Girl is brought up around abuse she will be abused too when she get older.

Point is it is not healthy and NO ONE CAN HELP U,

ONLY YOU CAN HELP YOURSELF

LEAVE BEFORE IT IS TO LATE (DEATH)

Answer 24

Go to someone in secret, like a lawyer or something. Just say your going to the mall (and you didn't find anything you liked to buy). Keep a log of every time he hits you, where, when, and how bad it is. Some people do this and it helps them enormously for financial and court reasons.



As for your daughter, the worst thing for her now is to see you get hit. Children who see that in their house hold and grow up around it start to think this is normal and marry someone who beats them, too.

Answer 25

First he has a drinking problem, he needs to address that. Also he is beating you, your daughter will be next, or worse. Notify law enforcement of your situation,get into some type of family counseling, and get your husband treatment for his alcohol addiction. Let him know in no uncertain terms that things have to change or he is going to lose both you and his daughter. Good luck and God Bless!

Answer 26

Ok, you know you're ridiculous, so I will talk about your daughter.



You are showing her how a man should treat her. As her mom, you are her role model. If you stay, someone, some day will hit her and she will think it is ok, because you taught it to her. No matter what you say to her, she will mimic what you do! You need to leave FOR her and for yourself.



I was lucky enough to leave my abusive husband before we had kids. I will pray for you. Good Luck!

Answer 27

i so hope your not joking because that's domestic violence and it is not a joke. but i would leave him because even if your daughter was to stay with him she would grow up in a troubled environment because her father is abusive and that can really affect her future..yours also. one thing that is common with a lot of people is that they cant move on from something because they're always waiting for that good thing to happen again...even if they have to go through some type of suffering to get it.

i would suggest you leave immediately before something that could have been avoided happens.

Answer 28

time to have talk. not a talk with your soon to be an ex-husband but with your daughter. yes, it will hurt your daughter but talking to her is VERY important. and you are doing this for the benefit of your daughter so that she will learn that when she grows up, its not okay for ANYONE to be hitting her. you need to show her that you need to stand up for yourself so she can learn to be a strong individual. teach her. also, ask her if she would like to see her mommy getting hit and hurt. your daughter would say no of course. then ask her if she would like to be with her mommy who could be a bit happier. listen, you have abusive husband and you DO NOT deserve that. no one in this world deserve that. i know a few stories of women leaving their abusive men for a long time. nd then the men learned the hard way to change their ways. as a man personally... i would never hit on someone that i really love. its just not in me. so i would just file for a divorce after you have a talk with your daughter. good luck and stay strong!

Answer 29

Is he an alcoholic? He needs professional help. The best thing you can do is to take your daughter and leave. Let him know that you cannot live like this anymore. You don't want your little girl growing up this way, thinking abuse is acceptable.



If you really love him and care about him, tell him to get help. If he sobers up and stops abusing you go back and try to work it out.

Answer 30

You definately do needc help if you are staying with a guy who beats you. I know it is not easy to leave but you have to. The trouble is your perspective of life. You think this is ok but it is not. You have to envisage a better life and then go out there and get it even if it means sleeping on the streets...at least you wont be undeer someones thumb. You ar efrightened but believe me there is nothing to be frightened of . In the words of one president....apart from fear itself.



I dont want to sound contrite but good luck and please do it...LEAVE HIM.

Answer 31

My step dads father he used to beat his wife every day and my step dads been there to witness this. He hated his childhood because of this you dont want you daughter growing up in a false family i know i wouldn't im only 14 but i understand you just want what's best for your baby girl. but its not right to live your life being scared and when your older when she thinks the world of her dad you wont like it because you know what hes really like.

trust me you should leave him pack up and go maybe leave him a not instead of telling him to his face if hes violent.x

Answer 32

Just leave him one night when he is sleeping and bring your daughter too and rent out a hotel!!



Do what Tina Turner did in "What's Love Got To Do With It".



Go to a place where you can never be found or go live with your family.



ORRRR call the police!!

Answer 33

Seek help. It's hard because you love certain parts of him , and you have a kid together. Either tell him (when he's sober) that if he doesn't change you'll leave. Or if that seems too scary then get some help. A friend , call the police , anybody that you can talk to ..not a bunch on strangers on yahoo.

Answer 34

He,s what they call a mean drunk. That means when gets to drinking he gets mean, and he will take it out on you when there is no other outlet. These men are totally unpredictable. He needs to be confronted with his problem. He needs to be told that he either get help for his problem or your gone. That you are no longer going to be his punching bag. Period.

Answer 35

call the law and tell them what is going on so they can be there while you get your things and file for an order of protestion. my mom did this with my dad. he was hitting her and ended up beating me in the end. i spent 4 weeks in the hospital recovering from stitches and a concusion. (sorry for spelling). plz think of your child. the law can help and give you contact numbers for many useful resources you may need to be on your nown. you can do it. plz protect your child before something bad happens. my dad could have killed me and finnally my mom took action after i was hospitalized. we never thought he would ever hit me, but alcohol was involved and it changed him. plz get out of there for your childs sake. i beg you.. think of your little angel.

Answer 36

It doesn't matter if he is the only father she knows. He is a threat to you and your daughter and you should come up with a plan to leave him as soon as possible. Contact a women's resource center and they will help you get out. If you want your daughter to live a peaceful life, it is in your best interest to get out.

Good luck.

Answer 37

You need to think of your daughter in this case. What would you do if he decided to hit her when he got drunk?



You both need to leave and go stay with a relative. Just pack a bunch of stuff and leave when he goes to work.

Answer 38

It is very easy to say to leave.....for some one who is not in the situation. Unfortunately, it happens to alot more women then what we think. I am in this exact same situation and I couldn't be more terrified. I know my husband would be devistated if I took our daughter from him, but some times I feel as if this would be the only way. We have been together for 4 years now and married 2. I am now ready to be out of the relationship, but of course he doesn't want to let it go. I have thought about leaving out of state to go stay with my family, but like I said my husband would be devistated if he didn't have his daughter. But in all fairness, he doesn't think about how you are devistated each time he hits you. Honestly, if you have enough strengh and some one to go to, leave. It will be harder on your daughter to grow up around her parents if he is beating you. She will not have as much respect for you because of how she sees her father treat you. People always say it is better to have both parents around....forget that...do what is best for you and your daughter. You are not the one who is wrong in this situation. I promise you. He might even harass you for doing 'the wrong' thing. But who cares. I know my husband is the most manipulative bastard out there, and he is so good at talking me out of doing what I would find to be the 'best' thing to do. I am just looking for that day that I have enough strengh to say 'enough'. I have been slowly working on getting him moved out....if this does not happen soon, I will just have to get myself to move out of state and forget about his feelings and focus on mine. There is no 'easy' way out of this one. Best of luck to you!

Answer 39

Have you tried moving back in with your parents? Contacting the police? There are shelters that will help battered women and their children get away from their spouses.

Answer 40

its better if you leave him. who knows wat he'll do to ur daughter once she's older. and the longer ur staying with him, the more ur ruining the daughter's life. she might not no, but one of these days she'll come in and see him beating u:



1. she'll get violent and might do something bad to her own "dad" like beat him with a bat



2. tell the cops so the cops will take him to jail.



wat im tryna say is leave. when he's a asleep take ur daughter and write a note saying that ur leaving. when morning arrives



1st. change ur license plate number

2nd. change back to ur maiden name

3rd. (if its possible) change ur SS#

4th. if you have a cell phone, change that number too

5th. maybe change ur daughters first name just in case

Answer 41

You are raising your daughter to believe that a man can hit her and its ok. If that's what you want for her then stay. Otherwise, get yourself to a women's shelter and save yourself from being beaten to death in front of her eyes.

Answer 42

you need to leave late at night. i know, you dont want your daughter to be away from the only dad shes known, but its for the best of you two. hes obviously not safe to be around, and your daughter could get hurt. please just leave him. hes just another idiot making stupid mistakes in his life. and when he notices your gone he'll regret it a lot. i mean, its rediculous to stay around. and have the torchore keep going.

Answer 43

Call the police. Then they will come and take him away and you and your daughter will be fine. Would you rather have your daughter have a dad or have someone like a dad that could end up beating her too? If you call the police you can save both of you. Please go to the poice.

Answer 44

make safety plan..important papers, and other stuff you can place somewhere safe..with money..when you are ready to leave..just leave..go the police..get into a shelter..I am DV survivor..I suggest that you do leave..abuse is wrong and the child is subject to abuse by witnesses what is going on with her parents..by him beating you..she deserves better..and so do you

Answer 45

well ma the best thing to do is leave him but then again some people in that siuation are also afraid to do it.but then again it is also a smart choice to get help from someone you know well and can trust.its the best t get out of the situation before it gets worse

Answer 46

He only hits you when he drinks? When he's sober, he wouldn't do that to you, right? Then you need to leave or needs to quit drinking. When he's drunk, it's only inevitable until he touches your daughter. Save yourself and your girl before it's too late.

Answer 47

I was a battered military wife for years, almost killed 3 times, several of my other friends of battered men are dead.I got out, thank God, get out before it is too late and your child won't have either parents.

It won't be easy, but I am a living testimony that you can get out alive and well. which I do still have loss hearing in my right ear. but my kids are so much happier, He got on drugs and is in penitentiary as we speak. was still abusing his girlfriend.

I don't condone violence with violence, Get out now! Please!

Answer 48

Leave him you keep your daughter around him she may have problems once she gets older If you leave her she will lose her dad but she will be a better mom becuase she didn't have his bad influence

Answer 49

what you need to do first is talk to someone who can help with your emotions.. then you have to save enough money so that when you leave you do not need to go back to him.. if you are divorcing him i would get a lawyer and fill out the forms.. i hope this works out for you.. i dont think any one should have to go through that!

Answer 50

Leave him, go with your daughter to a friends house. Call the battered womens shelter, and the domestic abuse hotline.



I wish you the best.

Answer 51

do not worry about being embarrassed ! Leave asap, you don't want to worry about your little girl not having her mother in her life. It will only get worse!

Answer 52

you answered your own question you said your ridiculous for staying with him get a divorce. your little girl will be fine. just wen she is old enough tell her

Answer 53

leave the guy. call the police. get him arrested. take your child so that she she wont grown up the way ur husband has.

Answer 54

Report the abuse and leave him. If he does this to you, he will probably someday to the same to your daughter. Get out while you can.

Answer 55

if you love him: go to some type of couseling and try to fix the problem

if you dont love him: file for divorce, and see if you can stay with some family for the time being of some close friends.

Answer 56

Don't be so stupid!!! Leave now before he hurts your poor little girl!! What the hell are you thinking??? Why would you keep your little girl in that environment???!!

Answer 57

So ... why are you thinking about getting back with an ex-boyfriend if you're married? Hmmm?



No wonder your "husband" is drunk and angry.

Stop "cheating."

Answer 58

Find a way to leave now, unless of course, you want your daughter to grow up and marry a man who beats her.

Answer 59

leave him...would you rather have your daughter never see her father again, or her never seeing her mother again, because your husband killed you or something. Then she would ahve to live with an abusive father and probably get beat also.

Answer 60

you really need to get out of your house.

that is abuse and even if you do not want your daughter to suffer you are suffering just for her.

you need to tell her that he is hitting you and you can not take it any longer.

take her and you away from him.

or talk to him and tell him that you want him to stop hitting you or else

you will leave.

--good luck

Answer 61

Leave. Now. It won't get better. Take what you need and go to a woman's shelter. They can help you from there.



Don't think that he won't start beating your daughter, either.

Answer 62

Yahoo answers isn't going to fix this. Call a battered woman's shelter in your town(or a nearby town). They can help.

Answer 63

stop buying alcoholic drinks :-) o, and leave him!

Ur doughter can decide if she wants to see him later, for a kid its not good to grow up with this kinda cr*p. soooo..

Answer 64

Call your local shelter/emergency room...AND GET OUT!!!

or will your next question be "what do I do...he's beating our CHILD?"

If you don't want to protect yourself, for God's sake...PROTECT YOUR CHILD...an abuser is an ABUSER!!

GET HELP..Good Luck.

Answer 65

i say you should try to tell him to stop drinking. if that doesnt work, move out of the house for awhile, and take your girl with you. if hes smart he will tell you he will stop drinking and beg for you to come back. dont be scared.:D

Answer 66

this is a serious problem. next time he beats you threaten him that your going to leave him or ur going to call the police. my advice to you is that you need to leave or find him some help...NOW!

Answer 67

tell him next time it happens you'll leave with your daughter and if it happens again, leave immediately, no negotiations, no i'm sorries, just leave.

Answer 68

i'd run away from him just take your stuff and your daughter and go =] plenty of kids grow up fine with out a father i did =]

Answer 69

Leave him.

Let him see your child every so often but only if he does not beat her too.

Answer 70

leave him. drunkards are unpredictable. who knows what he could do next?

think of your daughter. she's not safe with that kind of man in your house. you and your daughter deserve better.

Answer 71

Okay either:

1:Curb stomp him then run like hell.

2:Divorce him

3:Divorce THEN get a restraining order

4:Ask one of your close friends for advice.

Answer 72

call social services. who will come to the house and take him away... and go live with a trusted relative like your mom/sister/brother/even bestfriend. who he wouldn't beat you in front of. notify police because that is illegal, i know a man who punched his kid and has been in jail for 2 weeks, if he is doing more then that then he should be in jail

Answer 73

don't be 'DUMB" no more !!! call the police on him whenever he beats you up again!!!! then take it from there.

Answer 74

You should get help. http://www.abusedadultresourcecenter.com/index.htm

Go to that website.

Answer 75

run, walk, car, bus or swim--just get out now. it is not going to get better with him.

Answer 76

stay away from him

Answer 77

well..dont fight with him when he's drunk

just make sure your daughters with you,and goto bed

Answer 78

leave his ***. why r u even asking this type of question on here

Answer 79

Buy a gun and drop him where he stands

Answer 80

Stab him in his sleep.