Should I not attend my sister's wedding?

Question

My sister and I have grown apart over the past 15 years. I've tried to reach out to her on several occasions and I get no results. I've said that her and I should get together, but there was never any initiative on her part. Been getting real tired of it. She lives 7 minutes from me.

She will be getting married soon and I know dam well I won't be included in that wedding party. I'm her sister. I should be her maid of honor. I mean how humiliating will it be for me to show up at her wedding and not be her maid of honor or even in the wedding party. As her sister I consider that a slap in the face.

So, she never calls me. All I get is a facebook post once a year on my birthday or a phone call if she can't get in touch with my mother. She has nothing to say to me at all. We never had a falling out over anything, just grew apart. So, why should I attend her wedding while I am continuously offended by her actions?

Answer 1

I'm on your side, she needs to realize that being flaky isn't going to keep you waiting around forever. I'd understand if you lived states away, but she lives right up the street from you? She doesn't deserve your patience anymore.



My half sister lives in South Dakota and I live in Arizona, I'm 18 and she's 32, she moved out of the house when I was 5 and still visits me and calls me to make sure I'm making good choices. Even after our mom passed away 2 years ago, we still made the effort to stay in touch because all we have now is each other. Hopefully it won't take the death of one of your parents to bring you both closer, that should never be the reason. It's a shame your sister doesn't see how valuable her loved ones are, there is only so much time we get to spend together...I guess that will be her lesson to learn.

Answer 2

OMG if it had been my sister i might sit down down and inform her 2 reconsider marrying that man,if she is cussed i would do nothing in need of calling her a dumbass and i'd ship a present however now not attend a marriage ceremony i do not help i'd provide an explanation for this to her and let her make her determination even as letting her understand ill love her both way but he has to show himself priceless before he's permitted with the aid of ur family, and it doesnt really sound just like the loser will.

Answer 3

Well then I assume my brother as well has slapped me in my face because he chose a friend of his to be his best man over his own brother. He is currently marrying a woman that i dont believe is ready to be married. At first it was just me and my anger talking saying she was no good for him but being around them i was able to see that its more the choice making part on their behalf.



I personally did not want to attend my brothers wedding because of the ill planning on their part. I realized that regardless of what my brother does and what choices he makes those are his own. If he chooses not to talk to me thats fine I shouldnt take offense to that only note to myself that after all is said and done he is still my brother and I will look out for him. He is just a little lost and needs life to teach him a lesson.



What i am saying to you is let your sister make the wrong choices she will reap what she soes haha hope i spelled it right. If she does not wish to establish a relationship with you then don't force her to do it. If she invites you to the wedding go always keep that door open unless you are truthfully done with her. Take it slow you guys got a lifetime. Just pursue other interests for now and worry about yourself. Hope this helps even if just a little.

Answer 4

Listen, I know that you and your sister have grown apart and you feel a little insulted and taken for granted as she doesn't make an effort to contact you.

I've been in a similar situation, and how I successfully handled it was that I went to the wedding, but acted super nice and helped out around the place wherever I could, and this made her feel really guilty. Afterwards she apologised to me and now we are back to normal, no awkwardness what so ever.

Answer 5

I'm sorry to hear things have gotten this bad between you girls, however you have to understand you have done everything you can to reach out and she has rejected you, she's not interested in keeping you in her life.



Why do you feel your entitled to be in the bridal party or a matron of honour? Sorry but those are meant for people close to the bride, she gets to choose the people and you girls are NOT close so why would she put you in the bridal party? Sorry but just because your her sister doesn't make you entitiled.



IMO no you shouldn't go to the wedding.

Answer 6

Attend. Even if you just go to the ceremony and not the reception, go see her get married. It'll be good for her to see you support her, even just being there is showing maturity on your end...and maybe it will start healing whatever is wrong. It sounds a little bit like you WANT something to be wrong, though. Is there a reason YOU are not suggesting specific things to do instead of occasionally saying "we should get together" and waiting for her to do something about it? You do something about it...invite her out to dinner. Invite her and her fiancée out for coffee.

Answer 7

If she does not personally invite you to her wedding or include you in the wedding party, do not attend. You must be strong to withstand the criticism you will receive from the rest of your family. If you would not be able to put up with all the drama, just go to the darn wedding and be done with it.

Answer 8

it happens. honestly its not that big of a deal anyway. if your sister doesnt want you in her life then just accept it and move on. the fact that you grew apart the past 15 years says enough. my family is like that as well...things happen people move on its part of life

Answer 9

Being the sister does not entitle you to being the maid of honor.

Answer 10

i think you will go your sister's wedding. don't care about what she think, you like your sister, and may be it makes help to grow up your sister's felling for you. so my opinion you will go and best of luck.

Answer 11

I wouldn't. Why make an effort to stay in her life she doesn't make an effort to stay in yours?