a used to be "BFF" owes me money?

Question

it all started last year. i asked this friend if she's interested on going with me in vegas by june 2008. since we're both in a relationship (i'm married, she's living with her boyfriend), we automatically knew they're part of that little getaway. so, we began to plan 2 months prior in order to settle situations such as what day to arrive, what activities we're doing, what transportation we're using, and etc. given that i was the one who suggested the whole idea, i technically took charge of some fees (shows to watch, renting car) for the meantime. we compromised that we're going to half the car rental and cover whatever amount i have spent for the show tickets (his & her). i trusted her first hand because we're very good friends. i always update her in every detail i have gone accomplished (when i bought my itinerary, tickets from the show, car rental) while she didn't bother to share hers ( i didn't question, knowing that she's responsible enough). couple of months have passed, i received a text from her questioning if the trip is still on the line. i said yes and joke around that if she's not coming, i'll be really mad! then june came, we all met in vegas (she arrived one day early) then enjoyed ourselves! me and my husband invited both to party with us with some of our VIP access that was gained from our hotel package. introduced them with some family friends that we had lunch with in their house, cruised around the boulevard, shopped in some outlets, and etc! on that particular shopping bonanza we did, i discovered one of the many problems i will encounter later. it just happened that this friend saw some things she really liked. she didn't have any cash (they only accept cash), so i thought her boyfriend got it but didn't, actually. so they looked for an ATM. minutes later, they came back reasoning that the ATM is broken. the vendor already bagged the items she liked and coincidentally, i was paying my own stuff. she asked if i can pay for the meantime. i then again said yes. she made it sure she'll pay everything back later. days passed, the vacation was soon to wrap (they have to leave 2 days before us). we dropped them off in the airport, said our bye to each other, then discreetly handed her the bill manifest. total amount is around $300. all of a sudden, she acted really uncool. she reasoned that they're not supposed to be here in the first place, that they were about to abort the vacation before it happens. i was like, "why are you saying this to me now?". we decided that she'll just send me the check when i get back home (we both live in a different state). so when i came home, days, weeks, and months have passed, and still she owes me money (btw, she sent a check that was not even half of the total amount and it turned out to be a bad check). i tried everything to speak to her (countless calls, texts, voicemail, and emails but nothing was returned. obviously, she's hiding, ignoring, and brushing the chaos off. she even went home this past december for the holidays but didn't bother to phone me to patch things up. my other friends told me to just forget it and forget her! i am somewhat/almost over that event but it sometimes hunts me of what i should have done. there was no official statement-ish of what level of friendship we're still on because there is no closure. what do i do now?

Answer 1

she was using you for your money and that's not ok. if she apologizes and you forgive her, test her and give her a second chance. for the third time, if she still asked you for money and hasn't returned the money she owed you the second time, don't forgive her. just forget about her. You shouldn't do all the work and friendship is a two way street. if she's not doing her part towards her friendship against you, don't be her friend. truth is, if you keep forgiving her and being lied to, you're only hurting yourself.

Answer 2

You gave her the receipt, so the only proof that you have is the

bounced check.



It would cost more in time and filing fees to try to take her to small

claims court.



It sounds like the less expensive way to handle this is to chalk it up as a three hundred dollar lesson.



I would try one last ditch effort to get my money back by sending

a letter and copy of the bounced check via certified mail.



eg,



Dear Ms. __________:



On June ___, 2008 you attempted to purchase items at _________ store in Las Vegas, Nevada while on vacation with your boyfriend, my husband, and myself.



You did not have the funds and your items had already been rung up

by the cashier.



You attempted to withdraw funds from the automated teller machine (ATM) without success.



You then asked me if I could pay for your purchase, and that you

would reimburse me.



The items totaled $300.00 dollars.



You eventually sent me a check in the amount of $____________,

which bounced.



It is now _____________, 2009 and I have yet to receive a dime of the money I loaned you to make that purchase.



Enclosed you will find a copy of the bad check that you mailed me.



I expect payment in full via money order within the next ninety days, or I will pursue this matter in small claims court.



The expenses that you will have to incur to appear in court will be more excessive than the debt you owe me.



You may send the money order to the above referenced address.



Thank you



Mrs. _______________





She might fear having to fly to appear in court, as it would probably

cost more for a plane ticket than it would to pay you back.



Keep the original check and a copy of the letter that you mail.



Best wishes

Answer 3

"Never a borrower nor a lender be.". If this was supposed to be a loan then you should have put it in writing with an expected date of full repayment. What you do now is suck up and deal with the loss of money and move on with your life. You have no contract so there is only a "moral" obligation for her to repay you and not a legal one...obviously she doesn't feel the need to repay the "debt" you say she owes.

Answer 4

I think you got your closure by the way she reacted at the airport and refusing to take your calls. Of course she didn't see you when she was in your town, she knows she owes you money and is ashamed to face her. Chalk this one up to life experience and never, ever loan money even to your best friend...........it's the best way to end a friendship under bitter circumstances.