Question:
What do you do if your mom is racist?
*smitty #17
2006-06-04 01:13:37 UTC
If your mom is racist and often makes comments about people of other nationalities, what do you do?I'm not a racist person, but how do I deal with my mom being one?
Thirteen answers:
Plum
2006-06-04 01:16:07 UTC
Tell her that this is unacceptable to you.



Walk out of the room when she starts.
NYCchic
2006-06-04 08:18:24 UTC
You can 1. Ignore her or 2. Point out to her, respectfully, how ignorant her comments are. Put it in a way she can understand like....if she's fat..say what if someone didn't hire you because you're fat or....if she doesnt have a college degree ask....what if people looked down on you because you dont have a degree. Hit that sore spot...whatever it is and let her know that you don't appreciate her comments and ask her "Mom, who taught you to be racist?". People HATE to be called racist....even though that's what they are. Perhaps she will learn not to voice hateful opinions around you.
LyLsLick
2006-06-04 08:18:39 UTC
People arent born racist, its taught. There should be plenty of logical reason why your moms racist, probably influence or the experiences she had with different racist when she was growing up. If you could, find out more about her past and learn from her mistake.
Amber B
2006-06-04 08:35:44 UTC
You can't change people. People have to be willing to change themselves. Trying to convince people, persuade them, re-educate them rarely, if ever, works, and only makes them defend their stance more, which triggers the wrong cycle.



Your mom has her opinion, rightly or wrongly, as you do & she may will disagree with you as much as you with her. She has her reasons for her opinion, whatever they are, as you have yours.



I think the hardship for you is that it is your mom, and not just anyone. And it is hard for a tolerant person to know that a dear one is prejudiced. From anybody else, you can avoid their company, but it is hard to do that with your own mother.



What I have done (or tried to do, rather) with fmaily with whom I actively disagree on sensitive issues, and family I cannot avoid is to establish the rule with them that "Look, you have your opinion which I know, I have mine which you know. We obviously disagree on this point. Let's not argue about it. Just please don't broach the subject in my presence, or hearing range if possible, because we know we will disagree." That works 95% of the time. If it comes up in my presence, I just get up and leave the room, if asked why, I tell them they know, and ask them to call me when they are through talking about a hated & hateful subject. Over time, the subject hardly comes up.
OneRunningMan
2006-06-04 08:15:54 UTC
"Most of the racist people are older whites and blacks. When it does pass off to young people it seems to come from their parents. My mom is a racist and always has been, just like her parents. She has now learned not to say anything when me or my brother are around because we won't put up with it."
Titan
2006-06-04 08:17:07 UTC
For a moment, I thought you were gonna ask your mom is racist against yourself.. That would confusing as she would have been racist again herself, too.



To your question, let her be... Don't change mom.
CrazyOphelia
2006-06-04 08:19:12 UTC
Don't let the comments slide - make sure she knows that you don't agree with her viewpoint and if she would please in the future keep such racial comments to herself. Do whatever it takes to get through to her - from leaving the room, hanging up on her, to outright refusing to go anywhere with her.
justaname80
2006-06-04 09:38:31 UTC
It is very difficult or impossilbe to change someone's views on something they didn't come to ever come to believe by themselves..... So it would probaly be best just to tolerate her somehow......
mar6
2006-06-04 08:15:22 UTC
Try to be the example for your mom... talk to her about it and try to figure out why she is the way she is
2006-06-04 08:16:33 UTC
just be tolerant of her ways but point out at every opportunity how her thinking is fuked up!
nancy
2006-06-04 08:29:23 UTC
enjow the life it is precious
Spud
2006-06-04 08:16:13 UTC
Marry someone of another ethnic background..that'll teach her
2006-06-04 08:15:32 UTC
Shoot her! That should sort the problem.


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