I've never been in a situation like this myself but my heart goes out to you because I have a lot of family members who have been in similar situations and I've been through a personal hell as well. Here's a list of things I think you should do-
- Love yourself- always make sure your needs are met so that you can love your child in return- the thing you've heard a million times- how can you love if you don't love yourself? I know you didn't specify not loving yourself- but thats really what it sounds like- reality punches and having no friends and wanting to die, I think you definitely need to work on knowing, serving and loving yourself. Make a little time to do something for yourself here and there. If you want more tips on loving yourself- just google it because I'm not going to take the time to explain it here.
- Finish your degree asap. With a child on the way you know you're going to need a lot of options for work and for the sake of your child you have to find stability.
- Work on putting relationships in your life: find people who you can do fun things with even if you have to fake it- it might give you a spark of hope even if the relationships are somewhat fake, open yourself up to people- tell them your problems and ask them about their life- be vulnerable- that's how you start a real relationship- if you can afford it and you think its what you need get a therapist- you'll feel safe enough to talk about things with them since its their job and you will develop a strong relationship with them- just make sure you get a good therapist because I've had some bad ones who just pretend to care about you and that is NOT what you need. If you don't think a therapist is right for you still do the research to find out what kind of support organizations exist in your community. Find a good faith community if you are religious- and even if you're not try it- because what do you have to loose? There will be lots of loving and understanding people there and they should be willing to help you and your baby get by. Also try to rebuild the relationship with your parents so you can have their support for you and your baby. It might take time but everyone is capable of love- especially your parents since they raised you- even if you don't think so.
- Stay as far away as possible from drinking and drugs right now because they will only pull you farther under.
- Expect setbacks and learn patience. If the baby daddy doesn't give the time or money you need don't get angry but find another outlet for the money or keep trying- even if you can't find the money or what ever it is anger won't do you any good. If other problems arise remember that love and life are still waiting for you. Remember you have sooo much to gain here.
- Don't try for another relationship until you are stable. You absolutely don't need any more heart break.
- Accept your situation as something that you can move through and that its not the end. Notice the little happiness in life and practice gratitude.
- Do things to get out of yourself like volunteering, helping random strangers when opportunity knocks and answering questions on ask even! This will make you feel good about yourself and be able to see love in this world.
- This is a really good blog that I find inspiring written by a freshman in college- you may or may not like it but I find her posts really relate-able: http://kendallmadison.blogspot.com/2014/03/draft-1.html
- Lastly stay strong because if you come out of this just imagine how awesome having a normal life is going to feel when you get out of all of this! I praying for you and believe you will find a way!