How do you tell a family member they need help? (Alcoholic)?

Question

My sister's 33, has history of depression for several yrs, been on Prozac for about 10, binge drinks, drinking 3-4 x a week. Her boyfriend(also heavy drinker) & her live w/ my boyfriend & I in our apartment. She needed help paying off debt and I offered the place, becoming more than I can handle. I hate talking behind her back, I know she needs help - I just don't know how to tell her. Tonight she came home after drinking all night and like always - after she's already totally drunk, she bought wine on the way home to drink at home - her boyfriend is throwing up in the shower and they were unable to drive themselves home. This is a situation that happens at least every other week. I am becoming resentful - tommorrow instead of enjoying Saturday - I will drive her across town to pick up her car in the bar's parking lot. I'm tired the drinking & seeing her sad. She goes to work 2-3 x a week and sleeps the rest off - has a high paying job & rest of our family has no idea, puts on front.

Answer 1

I know how hard is to see someone you love drink their life away, both of my parents are alcoholics and now my 21 year old sister just discovered she was too (3 DUIs) I know you mentioned the fact that you know about Al-Anon but that has been my saving grace! Once you find a meeting in your area that you really like it makes a big difference. If you really want your sister to help you need to let your whole family know because it is a family disease -everyone is effected its not fair for you to take all the brunt - IYou have choices too, you don't have to waste your saturday - tell her to find someone else to get her car - it sounds like you are enabling her - which is very common (I did it for years with my parents) You can tell her how you feel when she is sober- offer going to an open AA meeting with her if she is ready, sometimes it takes the alcoholic to hit rock bottom to realize they have a disease Remember to take care of your self you are not her babysitter Good luck http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/

Answer 2

in case you opt for to slot in at those events drink non alcoholic beverages and while you're so nervous of this do no longer pass, additionally you realize first hand what fools human beings make of there selves whilst inebriated and how propose they might get so why even think of roughly all the events and do some thing else and don't situation how your individuals sense its your existence and physique so stand your floor and don't drink your a greater useful guy or woman for this

Answer 3

Hey they bring these problems on to their selves.You should tell them how you feel about the situation and that you are fed up with it.They will have to want to help their selves before any body else can.If they can afford to consume so much alcohol each week they should be able to afford to live some where else and let you live your life without their problems.Be firm or else it will continue on for along time.

Answer 4

hi i really feel for you its not easy to live with and the worst thing is U can tell them they need help but to be honest they will resent being told and you may even fall out over this but really you have got to tell her before she either loses her job due to the smell of alcohol or she gets ill to the point of ir-revesible affect (liver).You maybe need to say NO to collecting the car once in a while.its not being nasty is a start.most of all take no notice of what gets said and be strong.Goodluck

Answer 5

get her and the boyfriend out! set a deadline and stick to it (sorry,it will be hard). you tried to be nice and here you are.

sorry darlin' alcoholics live for that...alcohol.

A few of the posts before this are also helpful. she's you sister, you love HER, ...BUT you have been nice enough, MORE than enough.

good luck.

ps- ENJOY your Saturday, let her take a cab

Answer 6

"Abuse of alcohol is not aloud in my home PERIOD"



"If I catch you or your boyfriend out of control of yourselves one more time, I will throw every single bottle I see either of you with in the garbage because I CAN".



"The next step will be an eviction notice".



"It's time you start taking responsibility for the way you live and since you are out of control of your life in my home it gives me the right to have say in the matter".

Answer 7

Well sad to say,but unless she is willing to get help,you can't make her,you'll just continue chasing her everywhere & checking her,she has to be the one to make the step.

Answer 8

She has to want to help herself. All you need to tell her is you're tired of this crap and she needs to go and take that b/f with her.